Holiday Travel with Babies and Kids
Planning, Patience, & Perseverance
Holiday Travel with Babies and Kids: Planning, Patience, & Perseverance
The question I’m asked most at this time of year: “How on earth do I travel with a baby (or a little kid) and keep my sanity?!” Uncover my tried-and-true plan developed as a counseling professional, to teach you how to not only survive your holiday travel, but enjoy the time spent with your family and closest loved-ones. As you’re probably familiar with, traveling with little ones requires ample planning and takes up valuable space in your brain. So, how do you accomplish planning your vacation while also enjoying the holidays?
Good news! It is possible!
However, let me pause here for a second and reassure you that the stress and anxiousness that comes with traveling with an infant – or young children, or both – is very normal. Those feelings are your brain doing its job in telling you the vacation is something for which you need to prepare, but gosh, it can get so overwhelming!
So, how is it possible?
Stop and take a break. Catch your breath. I know….it sounds counterproductive, right? Why take a break when there is a mountain of laundry, suitcases to pack, house needs to worry about, and the list goes on when preparing for a trip with littles?! Hear me out and trust me on this one! As a career counselor who’s often juggling a full-time workload on top of being a mother, I developed a trusted plan from my own personal experiences to help alleviate the stress-load that can come with traveling during the holidays. Giving yourself some time to step away, going outside and standing in your bare feet (if possible) to collect your thoughts, or simply going to a different room in the house and sitting for a bit can allow you the moments you need to think about and plan your next steps.
Planning, Patience, and Perseverance
1. Planning. Put pencil or pen to paper and write out what needs to be done. I know we have those wonderful things called smart phones that are supposed to meet all of our needs, but there is something different in how the brain processes things when written with pen or pencil compared to typing. Writing also gives you a reason to buy those cute post-it notes and list tablets from Office Depot or Amazon!
When I know I have a trip coming up, I start a list for myself, another one for my toddler, and another one for my husband – although thankfully – he gets all his stuff together and organizes it for packing. When do I start the list? Usually, two weeks in advance because my mind is already going there!
Tip: If traveling by plane, what can you arrange to have ready for you at your destination? When we flew with our son when he was eight months old, we shipped diapers, wipes, bath soap, lotion, and several other necessities to my sister’s house so we didn’t have to manage all of that on the plane. I asked my sister to coordinate borrowing a high chair. We only needed enough diapers and wipes for the plane which took up much less space. Also, baby wearing is very helpful in airports so you can have your hands free! If your infant is too big for a wrap, I highly recommend a stroller or stroller/car seat combo that can be gate checked. Don’t hesitate to ask the gate agent for assistance with the gate tag if needed. Remember, it’s okay to ask others for help, especially in what can be a high-stress situation or environment.
2. Patience. Going back to what I said above – traveling is stressful no matter what but throw in an infant and/or additional kiddos and it can be downright crazy at times. Factoring in the stressors that often accompany holiday vacations can dampen your planning process as well. Reminding yourself (as well as the little ones) to remain patient despite the stress is one of the most beneficial steps, as doing-so can emit a calming energy and presence to alleviate any situation. Patience is a byproduct of dealing with stressful situations without being overwhelmed, annoyed, or anxious. That’s not to say you won’t feel those things, but when you take a minute, step back, and breathe, you can focus on the goal at hand which is to enjoy your kids and the holiday season.
Planning and anticipating needs will help you be more patient. When you feel those thoughts of overwhelm creeping in, remind yourself of everything you’ve done so far to get ready. Also, ask yourself what can be delegated or left undone until you get home. I’m giving you permission to throw that idea that you can do it all and have it all right out the window! While you’re practicing patience with your kiddos, remember to allow yourself some grace too.
Tip: When you’re writing your planning list, put a star or asterisk by the things that tend to cause the most stress. For example, if you know the last couple of hours before leaving the house are the most stressful, what can you do in advance to help? Are there things your spouse or partner can help with to reduce stress? Are there smaller tasks the kiddos can help with? Anticipating needs and brainstorming solutions as part of the planning can really help minimize stress as it gets closer to departure.
3. Perseverance. Isn’t this the same thing as patience?! No, but it goes hand in hand with planning and patience when traveling with babies and kids. Persevering is committing to something and seeing it through (endurance!) even when it’s hard. Essentially – keep the goal in mind. Organizing, doing laundry, and packing are just three pieces of the total puzzle. If you’re struggling with setting goals for yourself, or how to break them down in order to achieve them, take a look at my most recent blog post!
When it starts to feel too hard, go back to what I said at the beginning – allow yourself to take a break. I’m giving you permission now to NOT feel like all the laundry must be done in one day and everything packed the next. Go back to your list – with the items that tend to cause the most stress, what can be rearranged? What can wait another hour, two hours, or another day?
Tip: Speaking of the list! For the things you’ve starred or placed an asterisk as most likely to cause additional stress, and figuring out what you can do in advance, what are some of the ‘absolutes’ that can become ‘maybes?’ As you pack, place bags and suitcases by the door as a visual of completion. Check things off the list as you go so you have the visual of progress. For things that must be added to the list, try to cross off one or two items first – again, this is to prevent overwhelm.
Last minute suggestions for air travel:
Take copies of birth certificates and place them in the zipper pocket inside your purse or backpack for easy access.
If you print boarding passes in advance, put them in your wallet next to your ID.
Be sure to take a change of clothes for yourself and your baby/each child on the plane. Don’t ask me how I know!
Put liquids in a separate bag at the top of your carry on for easy access in security.
Security will run bottles of milk through a machine to check for various things – I suggest having this in an easily accessible place as well.
Backpacks are easier to use than traditional diaper bags because you can carry it and have your hands free.
If you’re staying somewhere with a washer and dryer, pack lighter and buy detergent at your destination; this will reduce the amount of luggage (and fees!) and you can come home with clean laundry!
Last minute suggestions for car travel:
If traveling by motor vehicle, pack what you can the night before leaving.
Use a travel cube or car cubby on the floor between seats to organize and store snacks, a couple of changes of
clothes, extra diapers, wipes, and toys for easy access.
If you have space, you can also pack a separate, smaller bag with only overnight things if you’re staying in a hotel; this prevents unloading all the luggage for one night.
Let kiddos travel in what makes them comfortable. Plan to stop at least every couple of hours, if possible, to let everyone out of their car seats and seatbelts to stretch.
Public libraries are great places to stop with kid friendly areas, bathrooms with changing stations, and picnic tables (in many areas) where you can have a snack outside of the car.
If this list helps you in any way, please let me know! What else would you add to the list? If the stress of planning your Holiday travel begins to outweigh the joy you wish and deserve to feel, don’t be afraid to ask for help! If you’re struggling with more than just your typical holiday stressors, or feeling more overwhelmed than you usually do, don’t hesitate to look for outside resources as well. A trusted counseling professional, such as myself, is a great option for additional tools/resources for you for every season! We can continue the conversation through email: droliviaw@oliviawedelcounseling.com.